Slugged & s-Nailed By Guinness!

Guinness is Good for You? –Well it may be for some but we have found out that a ‘tipple’ and a ‘splosh’ is deadly for Slugs & Snails here in Wednesfield!

Carefully and tenderly flowers have been planted by volunteers in flower beds across Wednesfield, as part of a plan, to win yet again another Gold Award in the Heart of England in Bloom competition.

But after the carefully planting our flowers, a dastardly act has been taking place, and within days lots of plants had just disappeared!

But it is not vandalism or theft that is removing the treasured flowers! Careful detective work revealed that they were being ‘munched’ upon by a huge army of slugs and snails!

Councillor Phil Bateman said “ I was explaining the problem to a crowd of people the other day when one of the old chaps I was talking too, told me that the way to stop these Gastropods, was to drown them in Guinness as they couldn’t resist a tipple!

So I decided I would try this little trick, and so off I toddled to the High Street Newsagent and bought two cans of Guinness.

Now I grew up with the old advertising slogan “Guinness is good for you” and I am reliably informed that recently the scientific l fraternity has confirmed that the product is indeed ‘good for you’.

Diageo, the manufacturer, makes no health claims for their product, however scientific research shows a pint of Guinness a day is actually good for your health.

But I wonder if Diageo are not missing a trick and are losing out on sales? Britain’s army of Gardeners surely would be better placed by setting down pots of Guinness instead of poisons and allowing these munching Gastropods to drown – in happiness in the Guinness! “

Take a look at the photograph as dead slugs and snails were drowned in their scores as they slurped their way through Irelands trade mark beverage!

Guinness is not good for you if you are a Slug or Snail In Wednesfield!

Councillor Phil Bateman added ” I will drink to that!”

Phil Bateman

Phil Bateman is Married to Mary and lives in Wednesfield North. He was a long serving local politician having served previously on the now defunct West Midlands County Council... read more